Garbage Protection Services Group

Have you ever felt the following about taking out the garbage at night?

• nervous
• scared
• intimidated

It's perfectly normal to feel this way. There are real dangers in this world and it's okay to ask for help!

The Garbage Protection Services Group (GPSG) offers secure and reasonably priced ($10/semester, along with a $2 paperwork processing fee)* to help to dispose of your garbage. Our staff have been trained at the highest military and civilian training facilities in the world and have served in the streets of Mexico, Brazil and Southern Provo.

Our agents have nerves of steel, capable of taking on both man and beast

Some have served in various military roles.

Many of our operatives have spent time as double agents and can move freely among the villains of the universe.

Others have spent time in jail and are completely home among criminals.

So call today (1-781-452-4077) and feel safe as you dispose of your garbage!

*shipping and handling not included. AA batteries required and also not included